the sinner in me
2009 Resolutions
Keep studying
Be a great boyfriend, and a good son
Be more all-rounded
Stop shrinking and start growing again
Be able to answer to myself
My Second Wind
I fear stagnation and lack of progress. I fear never reaching my potential and being average. I fear being forgotten. The past. Yesterday's news. I fear giving up and being passed by, going softly into that good night. I fear letting those I love down, letting myself down. I fear settling, giving in to the "that's just the way it is" mindset. I fear dying without leaving my mark. I fear not feeling these fears anymore and just floating along. These fears feed me, they nourish my drive.
I love my fear.
just when i decided to be a responsible bloke and clean out my room on a weekend, my modem decided to bail on me and leave me isolated from the rest of the world. now i'm blogging from the office, and i don't suppose many of you have the vaguest impression of how pathetic my situation is. to think my new modem will only arrive on friday. fantastic.
the fallen saint left at 9:55 am
i've got the weight of the world on my shoulders.
the fallen saint left at 12:29 am
it's not worth it, really.
the fallen saint left at 12:25 am
blogger has the uncanniest ability to fuck up every time i have something worth writing about. go ahead and say it only happens to me, i'm the unluckiest person subscribing to this service.
the fallen saint left at 12:03 am
Sunday, May 27, 2007
hiatus
had a chat with a friend the previous night about children. having them, to be specific, and how many if so. you can pick your jaw off the floor now, because i assure you i have not misfired or had an accident. so anyway, while i was having a swim in the morning i saw parents with their kids in the pool. i wonder what it must be like to look forward to a weekend when you'll take your son or daughter for swimming lessons. it's a nice thought, but i'd rather spend it doing my own things, so i suppose i'm not yet attuned to that mindset. that's a comforting reassurance, in a way.
so you will not see me online much at all in the coming week. i have just paid off the balance $399 for my pool cue and i probably will spend more time in the pool halls or watching videos on my set.
someone said it was a blessing in disguise and high time that i should get back to the basics. i don't mean to be philosophical, but this may well turn out to be a valuable experience for my 21st birthday.
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
stressed
why now and why me!
Saturday, May 19, 2007
go away, now
just leave, don't waste your time.
Saturday, May 12, 2007
so after a considerably extended hiatus from this place, and the misfortune of having nothing blog-worthy to write about, i finally came across some interesting incidents over the past couple of days. for starters, i am convinced i make better food than the people at pastamania's. excuse my arrogance, but take the things i cook and compare them to the similar recipes that they prepare, and i think mine comes out much more savoury.
then kelvin and i saw a whole congregation of lamborghinis outside the old national museum in the evening. at least 10 gallardos with their backs facing the main road, and an orange murcielago guarding each side of the entrance to the building. i'm tempted to say all the lamborghinis had turned out, but then i remembered the champagne-coloured murcielago i saw once cruising along the road outside of MOE.
and a really hot lass got on the bus and sat in front of us. where chinese girls go, she's as good as they come. yup, no hyperbole.
moving on to some unpleasantries, this morning after swimming with kelvin and on our way to westmall for lunch, a girl in a secondary school uniform approached me to help her buy cigarettes. (i hope it's) needless to say, i flatly rejected the request. maybe it's because i haven't been to heartland areas much, but this is really appalling. the girl being a minor, addicted to smoking, having to resort to asking strangers to help her purchase cigarettes, and the sheer audacity to do it in a school uniform!
it scares me to wonder how some people will turn out in future.